


We're all Ghosts in the End

by NamelesslyNightlock



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Angst, Declarations Of Love, Final Fantasy X AU, Heartbreak, Loki (Marvel) Feels, M/M, Sad, Sad Ending, Tearjerker, Tears, Tony Feels, Tragedy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-19
Updated: 2019-02-19
Packaged: 2019-10-31 14:54:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,374
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17851700
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NamelesslyNightlock/pseuds/NamelesslyNightlock
Summary: Thanos was dead, and the Infinity Stones had all been destroyed. They had done it, they hadwon– so why was Loki’s smile so sad?





	We're all Ghosts in the End

**Author's Note:**

  * For [KasumiAFKGod](https://archiveofourown.org/users/KasumiAFKGod/gifts).



> I honestly never thought I'd ever use that warning, and it snuck up on me, ngl, I only realised I'd need it about half way through and it hit me like a punch to the chest. 
> 
> Also, thanks to **Rabentochter** , who read this through and assured me it made sense.
> 
> I blame the whole thing, by the way, entirely on Kasumi. She had the idea to do an AU based on Final Fantasy X, which I have never played, but then she showed me [this video](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bRWkniXDC_4) and I couldn't leave it alone. 
> 
> I'm so sorry.

Thanos was dead, and the Infinity Stones had all been destroyed.

They had done it.

They had _won_.

They had lost a few good people in the fight against Thanos, but they had prevailed– fighting until the bitter end when Loki’s seiðr, Tony’s repulsors, Strange’s magic, and Thor’s lightning had all worked in tandem to destroy the Infinity Stones once and for all. It left the Avengers standing in the empty battlefield, the barren plains of Titan stretching endlessly before them like a terrible tribute to what they had only just stopped the rest of the universe from suffering.

Tony turned to face Loki with a bright smile, brimming with the ecstasy of victory, of the fact that they had made it through, they had both _survived_.

Loki’s answering smile was small, but Tony could see that it was true, the joy dancing through his bright green eyes despite the lingering touch of sadness.

But… what reason did Loki have, to be sad?

“Loki?” Tony asked, his smile falling into a frown as he took a small step forward. “Loki, we won.”

“Yes,” Loki said, some of the sadness lifting– some, but not all. “Yes, we did.”

Tony frowned, and his lips parted with a question on the tip of his tongue. But he was interrupted by a gasp and a terrified exclamation, and Tony’s gaze was drawn to where Valkyrie and Thor were staring at their hands in confusion and fear.

Their skin was turning blue, glowing and shining and– and when Steve tried to grasp Thor’s arm, it just went straight through, as if Thor were no longer really there.

“Oh, brother, I’m so sorry,” Loki’s voice whispered. “I’ll find you in Valhalla, I promise.”

As Thor looked up with confusion etched across his expression, Tony turned and stared at Loki in absolute horror– because Tony was fine, _Steve_ was fine, the only people affected were the Asgardians—

Which meant that _Loki—_

“Anthony,” Loki whispered, stepping forward, his smile still in place but still so very, very sad. “I have to go now.”

“No,” Tony said harshly, rushing forward with a sudden lurch, needing to wrap his arms around his lover and just hold on as tight and as long as he could, never letting go—

But he fell straight _through_ Loki’s chest, falling to the ground. He stayed there for a few moments in shock, disbelieving, trying to catch his breath and catch up on what was happening—

Because, _no—_

Loki couldn’t be—

Slowly, Tony pulled himself off the ground, meeting Loki’s sorrowful expression and silently begging, _pleading_ for Loki to tell him that it wasn’t true, that it was all a trick. Any moment now and Loki’s grin would appear, stretching wide and bright as he explained his clever prank.

Any moment.

Tony would just have to wait.

Broken cries echoed through the air as Thor and Valkyrie began to fade, disintegrating into bright blue stardust and drifting away on the light breeze– but Tony didn’t see it. His gaze was on Loki, his last, desperate hope shattering to pieces as Loki’s eyes only began to glitter with tears.

“No,” he whispered, stepping closer again, reaching for Loki’s cheek but this time too afraid to try and touch. “No, this isn’t happening, this can’t... We _won.”_

“I’m sorry,” Loki echoed, his voice little more than a breath of air, and Tony’s heart _broke_.

“I can’t lose you,” Tony begged. “Loki, I _can’t_.”

“It’s all right,” Loki whispered, his translucent hand ghosting over Tony’s cheek. “We were all dead already. Every moment with you has been a gift I did not deserve.”

The words crashed down with the force of a ton of bricks, and Tony’s knees near gave out.

“You knew this would happen,” Tony said, the realisation cutting through him like a thousand shards of glass. “You _knew_ , and you helped us defeat him anyway.”

“Yes,” Loki admitted. “Asgard was destroyed years ago by Surtur, but I… remade it. With my dying breath I recreated Asgard and all of her people, including myself. And I did it with the Space Stone.”

Tony’s gaze turned back to where he had only minutes earlier watched the broken, coloured shards scatter through the breeze– to where he had watched the only thing keeping Loki alive shatter to pieces. And he had been _happy about it_.

“Why?” Tony asked brokenly. “Loki… _why_ —?”

“It was the only way,” Loki said, smiling again as if that made it all right. “The only way to keep you safe.”

“I don’t want to be, not without you,” Tony pleaded. “There has to be a way we can—”

“No.” It was soft, but firm. “Please, Anthony. I don’t want to spend this moment arguing.”

This moment. This _last_ moment.

And it hurt, _god_ did it hurt, but Tony accepted that with the smallest jerk of his head.

Loki’s eyes softened, and then they began to glow. For a moment, Tony was terrified, his breath catching, believing that this was it– but the power in them wasn’t blue. It was _green_. Then Loki’s fingers were solid and whole as he caressed Tony’s face, and their lips pressed together in an agonising kiss.

Tony poured everything he was into their kiss, every ounce of passion, every inch of love he felt for Loki as if maybe, maybe that would be enough to keep him there. Loki held Tony close and kissed him back with just as much feeling, with the desperate yearning of never enough.

It was love and torment and misery, all piled together in one final, horrible farewell.

“I love you,” Loki said. “Anthony, I _love you—_ ”

“No,” Tony sobbed, shaking his head, his eyes stinging with salt. “No, please don’t say goodbye—”

“Of course not,” Loki whispered. “I will _always_ be with you.”

Tony whimpered as Loki kissed him again, and then again. They kissed until Loki's lips turned to nothing, until Tony’s arms were holding only air and Loki’s seiðr couldn’t hold back the inevitable any longer. And then Tony let his hands fall to his sides, hanging limp and useless as Loki tried to caress Tony’s face one last time.

But his fingers were nothing but stardust, fractals of light and a mere echo of all that he used to be.

“Loki,” Tony choked out, past the pain and fear. “I’ll always love you.”

As Loki’s last smile was lost to the wind, his voice lingered in a final whispered echo. “And I shall always love you.”

~

For a long while, Tony found that he could not move. He did not wail, and he did not weep. It was like something had reached inside and torn away everything that mattered, and he simply sat, staring at the sky, up at the unfamiliar stars and constellations and just… yearning. Trying to hold on to the only piece of hope he had left, because if he didn’t, he wouldn’t have anything left at all.

Loki had told him once, oh so long ago, that if Tony ever needed him, all he had to do was close his eyes and pray, and then Loki would skywalk straight to his side.

So when Bruce walked over and placed a soft hand to Tony’s shoulder, silently giving him support and letting him know that it was time to go home all at once, Tony tore his gaze from the stars and went through the motions, helping the others get back to the ship, get back to Earth. He wasn’t despondent, he was still _functioning_ – but on the inside, there was something fundamentally broken, something he knew that could never be pieced together.

And through it all, one single word echoed through his mind, the ghost of a memory.

 _Loki_ , he prayed.

But Loki had lied twice over, because no matter how hard Tony wished, Loki didn’t come, he still wasn’t _there_. The memory of him, the torturous remnants of sweet moments they had shared was not enough, and it only made everything harder to bear.

They may have won the fight, but the universe was still a little bit darker. Loki was gone, and Tony knew with all that was left of his shattered heart that he was lost forever.


End file.
